The Best Man

I must have watched the movie titled, "The Best Man" over a hundred times. For those who havent watched it, it's about a groom who discovered a day to his wedding that his best man slept with his wife to be when they were all in the University.

He was a play boy and his bride who was his girlfriend then always cried to his best man who was his best friend whenever she was hurt by him. He slept with her on one of such days when she cried to him and he consoled her. (Women hope you can hear this? If you want to cry, please cry to yourself)

The groom eventually forgave his best man and went through with the wedding. The wife had no idea that her husband discovered her little secret.

Now, I wonder if an average Nigerian guy will forgive this wrong (but was it really a wrong?) I'm refering to the men because they are the ones who usually have a problem with a woman's past; the women are expected to overlook not only a man's past but his present and his future. Afterall, it is a man's world. (I hear)

Even if a groom forgives, I doubt very much if that marriage will be peaceful. In my own thinking, seven out of ten men will bring up this issue at some point in the marriage and then start to regret carrying on with the wedding.

The truth is that everyone has a past and the past belongs to the past; what matters is the future.

My advice is this; if you find yourself in this sort of relationship where your spouse's past poses a problem to you, please think of your own past and take a chill pill.

Let him cast the first stone, he who is without sin. Dassol


  1. We should not cling to the events of the past

  2. D past of youthful exuberance is usually scary.
    My advice is 2 4get ur past so as not 2 find out bout ur spouse's past.

  3. Past is past and should be forgotten. Like u said we all have our past. Period!

  4. Dear Amaka,
    I will rather heal the past than forget the past by making atonement of my past sins in the present.

    Keeping our past failures before us should not discourage us but should rather help us acquire humble self esteem trusting in God's mercy.

    Forgetting the past without healing it will simply mean living in self denial.

    The past has a way of influencing the present and shaping the future.


  5. Past is past and gone. Don't go snooping for 'sins' committed before you appeared on the scene. And ladies, don't go opening wide your vocal cavity to tell all your past for it will surely haunt you as reference will be made from time to time. Let the past be left to lie low forever. Build your present and future in honesty, faithfulness, love, unity,friendship integrity and peace.

  6. He forgave her because he indirectly pushed her to his best friend and they weren't even married then. Forgive & move on

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